Creating Thriving Relationships The Quantum Way – Part 1

Are you feeling overwhelmed after narcissistic abuse and exhausted from trying to manage your relationships?

Are you struggling to know who to trust and can’t find the right connection you want for your life?

If this sounds familiar to you, I want to let you know that you are not alone and that there is a way to create healthy and thriving relationships.

I’m here to tell you there is a way to come home to your true self and manifest real, meaningful connections.

The truth is that we are all wired for connection, but many of us have had our hopes dashed by selfish, entitled and narcissistic people who have hurt us along the way.

I understand this feeling extremely well because I have been through this myself. After narcissistic abuse, I felt like it was impossible to find real and healthy relationships again.

That was until I faced the fact that I didn’t want to end this lifetime, regretting missing out on connection, community and true partnerships with others.

This is why we establish the values and truths defining healthy relationships. This way, you will realise how you previously unknowingly connected to toxic relationships.

It’s also vital to know how to identify these traits and stress test them with healthy boundary setting to see if they possess the right qualities and moral compass to be even capable of healthy relationships.

This is spiritual and manifestation mastery. While other methods can lead to human victimhood, this leads to true Thriving.

I hope that through this message, you can find the courage and hope to manifest healthy and thriving relationships.

If I can offer one piece of advice: work on yourself first. You will find healing and peace through self-reflection, deep inner work, and a commitment to manifest the relationships you want and deserve.

I am honoured and humbled to take you on this journey with me, and I look forward to sharing the other key components of Thriving with you.

 

 

 

Video Transcript

Welcome, dear Thriver, to Thriver TV, where you don’t just learn about narcissists and your abuse symptoms but how to heal for real from narcissistic abuse. If you have not yet subscribed to my YouTube channel, please do so, and I’d love for you to share my work with others who need it.

Today, I want to start off with a series that I’m doing, which is creating thriving relationships the quantum way, and this is part one.

And I really feel that this is so important because most of us here in our wonderful community have had grave disappointments in how we’ve experienced relationships. We’ve had selfish people, entitled people, and, of course, narcissistic people. So, who can you actually trust?

And more specifically and importantly, how do you trust yourself in order to choose people who are going, to be honest and honourable in your life, people who care about true partnership and people who are even capable of looking out for your wellbeing?

And I really do believe that you would love to know the answer to this rather than suffer the alternative, which could be staying alone for the rest of your life or maybe being so guarded that you can only experience relationships at the surface level, not allowing anybody to get close.

And please know I understand. I promise you I’ve been there myself because I tried to avoid risking connection for a very long time after abuse.

My life was spent overcompensating by working really, really hard or even working hard on my self-healing for long periods, using that as an excuse not to venture out into trying to create relationships again.

That was until I faced the fact that I didn’t want to end this lifetime, regretting that I hadn’t created a connection and community and real deep and committed partnerships with others.

And I understand that, like my previous self after narcissistic abuse, you may feel like creating real safe relationships is about as possible as flapping your arms and flying to the moon.

 

Being Consciously Able To Choose Healthy Relationships

So, how are we able to choose healthy relationships? How is that even possible after experiencing abuse? What if I was to tell you that real healthy relationship choices and creation are already who you are naturally coded to be?

It’s actually your true self code, and you have the ability to make that choice and create real, authentic relationships. It’s who you actually are at a true self-level. You just need to be guided and shown how to come back to this natural state. Being programmed out of that state has been your normal, but it’s not your natural.

In my upcoming Thrive Quantum Bootcamp Group, which begins on the 12th of September, together in week one, we work at establishing the values and the truths that are essential to define healthy relationships.

And it will make so much sense to you because you’ll understand immediately when you learn how you previously unknowingly connected to toxic relationships from day one and didn’t know it.

So until we know our values and our truths and how to define them and stand in them, it’s like getting into a taxi, and you say to the taxi driver, “I don’t know where my destination is.”

And, of course, you could end up at random destinations and have many unwanted outcomes. And these in relation to relationships, are the patterns of our unconscious, unhealed inner wounds, which is our unfinished business from childhood.

If we don’t know what is healthy and sound, did anybody teach us, then we will accept much less. And you may think that choosing relationships and people comes from a feeling of good alignment. It’s not because, after abuse, that right feeling is often extremely dangerous because what you have been used to is abusive and toxic people. It’s your familiar.

So it’s really vital to understand that if you are feeling a powerful chemical buzz of excitement and familiarity and yes about somebody, this is usually your ego doing the choosing.

And our egos are experts at self-sabotaging us, taking us towards pain and not away from it.

 

The Three Foundational Steps For Thriving Relationships

Today, I want to grant you the FOUNDATIONAL three necessary criteria to start manifesting healthy relationships.

• Number one is admitting that you want real relationships. And I know that’s very difficult for a lot of us here because you may have just decided, “No, it’s too painful, and I don’t want to risk the trauma of what I went through before.” But if you do want them and want to get in the driver’s seat of manifesting them, then you have to start by admitting that you want a true relationship. And if that’s you, put that in the comments below. It’s a very powerful first step. And then what we have to do is be willing to put in the effort to heal ourselves and learn what it takes to align with real relationships.
• Number two is the ability to define and learn the necessary truth for real healthy relationships. We have to learn about that stuff, absolutely, and we have to learn what it takes to align with those relationships that can be safe, healthy and happy for us.
• Number three is the courage to say no to what you have discovered is not in alignment with your values and your truth and to let go of people in situations that aren’t. Go empty and stay in faith of your truth until your values and your alignments arrive in your life.

Today, I want to share with you the three foundational steps for thriving relationships that is especially important for people in our wonderful community who have gone through significant abuse and toxic relationships. Number one is admitting that you want real relationships.

The breakthrough is it doesn’t matter what disappointments, loss, and trauma you have experienced, if you apply these three steps, you are going to be on your way to breaking out of toxic, painful, unsafe relationships to healthy, real, authentic relationships.

Because now, in your taxi, you know your destination and are not prepared to accept any random drop-off.

I love teaching people about these vital characteristics of healthy relationships, why they are foundational, and why no relationship can be built unless you have these foundations.

These values include empathy, honesty, accountability, vulnerability, teamwork and conflict resolution.

It’s so important to know how to identify these traits and stress test them with healthy boundary setting and with your questioning, and you are showing up as your authentic self to flush out those who aren’t.

This exposes very quickly whether or not somebody possesses the right qualities and the moral compass to be even capable of healthy relationships. And I go into how you do that stress testing very, very deeply in my Thrive Bootcamp because it’s a big conversation, and it’s a lot of stuff to learn and align with.

And then, of course, you need to know how to deserve these healthy traits and accept such a person, and you’re not going to sabotage yourself.

 

 

Beliefs are EVERYTHING!

So we have to look at why we’ve believed I’m not good enough, and this is all I deserve. Beliefs are such an important topic. They are everything.

And why is it that if we are naturally organically coded to manifest and receive thriving relationships, and we are, why has it been so hard to have good relationships? It’s because of beliefs.

It’s about traumas. They’re everything.

In Thrive week two, we peel this back hard to get to the truth. Your inner being programming from previous impactful, painful relationships has disconnected your power to align with and call force the healthy, thriving relationships that your soul is coded to have and does deserve.

In fact, you are likely pointed in the exact opposite direction. This is why opening up to new and healthy relationships feels so painful; it feels so confusing, and it can even feel impossible because your inner defunct programming is triggering opposing feelings.

So let me give you an example, one of quite a few of my previous life. I used to feel like it would never be possible to be expanded in omission and do the things that my heart desires while simultaneously being supported and loved by a man.

Rather, I’d always experienced men competing against me, putting me down, limiting me, demeaning me, and punishing me if I tried to expand and be myself.

And I was terrified to stand up for myself because I felt like I would get punished more and ultimately that he would leave me, that I’d be abandoned. So, I stayed connected with these types of people. I couldn’t let go of them, and I was emotionally blocked from creating and opening up to better people in situations for myself.

So is it true that all men are threatened by successful, passionate, motivated women?

I honestly used to believe that. No, it’s not true. These were my previous programmed traumatic beliefs that made me believe that. However, there are controlling men in the world, absolutely.

There are also beautiful supportive men that are happy enough in their own skin that they’re not threatened by a successful woman. And when I did the quantum shifts on myself to find those traumatic beliefs and to let go of them and heal from them and fill myself with my true coated true self-state of deserving more, then I started attracting and aligning men who were supportive.

And even my father shifted dramatically in the ways that he viewed me.

I lost all attraction to the former way I used to be programmed and would never tolerate it for a millisecond. I was no longer attracted to those types of men. So this is how we really shift.

And when we know we shifted, we know we would never participate. We wouldn’t argue with it. We wouldn’t roll around with it. We just would not be having it. And therefore, it’s no longer going to be our reality.

And in the past, I used to look at beautiful, supportive men in my friend’s lives who supported them full-heartedly in their careers and passions. But I was never attracted to those men because they were not my inner love code. They didn’t match my old traumas.

Once they went, I could see myself partnering up similarly and being attracted to it and being happy with it.

So, I want to share how to identify the painful relationship beliefs that keep you stuck in toxic and disappointing relationships. And it’s really quite easy to do.

All you need to do is take out a pen and paper, make sure you’ve got the space to really feel in and honour this time with yourself. And then think of the relationships that have hurt you. And, of course, these don’t have to be intimate partner relationships.

They could be family relationships, problems you’ve had with bosses or anybody. List the names as headings and then write down what happened to you that was painful, and just really be vulnerable and honour it.

So it’s things like I was cheated on, I was made invisible, I was devalued, I was betrayed, I was distrusted, connect to what happened that hurt and put I was because that’s what happened to you. And then, with all of these names and people, go through and circle the matches, and you will start to see a pattern form. These are your inner programmed patterns, and then you can write them out.

So what you do is you say, “The people I love…” Fill in the gap.

So it’s like the people I love cheat on me,

The people I love disregard me.

The people I love abandon me.

The people I love accuse me and distrust me.

Or you might have the people I work for.

Whatever your pattern and program, the people I love work for, befriend…And you’re going to start to see what your programmed, painful, toxic beliefs really are. Beliefs are so powerful.

They create how we feel. They create what we think, and what and who we connect with is going to be a match for those beliefs. And we stay attached to those beliefs and participate with them no matter how painful they are.

So, in short, our programmed inner beliefs unfold our entire life to a T on a relationship level and who we are having a relationship with. It’s everything. Painful inner traumas can be shifted from within you to start having healthier experiences.

And if you are not working at it from an inner quantum way, which is very fast and powerful. In that case, you can spend months, years, decades, a lifetime trying to do it mentally logically through learning, talking, and researching, but you are not powerfully and deeply changing on the inside.

And this is why often you’re going to have very limited results or actually no results, which is what I had for years and decades of learning, talking, researching, and therapy.

It never did it for me, the quantum way did because it’s like stepping out of a family sedan and getting into a Ferrari with the ways that you can heal.

So when I identified my inner painful beliefs and was able to heal them quantumly, it elevated me out of abuse symptoms such as agoraphobia, complex post-traumatic stress disorder (CPTSD), fibromyalgia, adrenal and cerebral trauma, which I was told I could never heal and so much more to the absolute emancipation, elevation and glorifying of my previous self.

I became the healthiest self I’d ever been, far superior to my previous self even before abuse. And this is why I’m always excited and thrilled watching others emerge from their cocoons of pain as well, breaking free from abuse symptoms in ways that have crippled them, well, in ways that stunned them, but things that have crippled them for months, years, decades, or even their entire life.

And this is really important because, in a relationship sense, you may be terrified of getting hurt again.

Maybe you don’t even feel capable of connecting, and you feel like you’ve got no energy to give somebody because you’re trying to survive your traumas.

And maybe you could be having the experiences of sabotaging potential relationships because of your anxiety, your depression, or your distrust.

 

Aftershock Stunts Your Ability To Heal and Move Forward

I want to talk about aftershock because it’s a really important thing to talk about. Aftershock stuns your ability to heal and move forward in your life.

I spoke about the phenomenon of aftershock in a recent Thriver TV episode, and this is when your abuse symptoms hit you with such ferocity that it is frightening, you feel emotionally crippled. You may even feel like you’re dying.

And it’s because finally, now that you’ve got space out of the relationship, what happened to you last week, last month, last year, last decade has the space to hit you like a freight train.

It all erupts from your unconscious into your consciousness.

Week three in Thrive is where we address this fully because, for most people, the reason why their life isn’t thriving is because they still have varying levels of aftershock in their system that are not letting them break free into their new and true life.

So this is where we go for the embedded internal traumas that are fueling aftershock, that have kept you in depression, anxiety, helplessness, hopelessness, PTSD, constant rumination and other nasties, which

I’ve met people who’ve been in aftershock for 40 years, even though they haven’t seen or heard from the narcissist for that amount of time.

If an aftershock isn’t addressed, you can’t move past the struggles and the battles you’re experiencing internally with your state of being. And if you are getting smashed from the outer world with all of the battles and the struggles and the setbacks, and what the narcissist is doing, aftershock is a serious impediment for you to be able to deal with.

Time alone does not heal aftershocks. I’ve seen the proof of that over and over and over. And much of what you’ve been taught about healing from trauma hasn’t been true.

It’s been the long, painful, hard way around to try to get unstuck, yet all of us, and it’s the same for you, you are much more magnificent than that quantumly than trying to think and learn your way out of your trauma. Your inner coding is set up for you to not just merely survive but to truly thrive.

 

Conclusion

All it takes is to discover a way to release your internal trauma and replace it with the light of your already coated source creation, your true self. And it may seem far too simple that that’s how you do it until you start healing the quantum way, and your results inside and out speak for themselves.

Because what we’re talking about here is spiritual, personal, and manifestation mastery from the inside out, direct from your inner being.

Everything else sadly and painfully equates to human victimhood and the struggles that go with that. So, I hope that today’s information and lessons have been helpful and enlightening for you, and I hope that they can grant you hope.

And I feel honoured and humbled to take you on this journey of thriving with me. I look forward to sharing the other key components in each week of my Thrive Bootcamp starting on the 12th of September in my next Thriver TVs. So, we will look at the following weeks in my follow-up series.

All right, so until the next one, keep smiling, keep healing, and keep thriving because there is nothing else to do. Lots of love. Bye-bye.